A Brief Message From Our Sponsor…

“Hey, it’s Kelly Killoren Bensimon, and we’re in Vegas. We’re on our way to the airport, but I just had to make a little quick stop at American Shooters and shoot a handgun. Crazy. The bullets were flying everywhere, and I actually have a newfound respect for cops and Angelina Jolie. She’s, like, a hardass who needs her own television show. So here’s to all you rockin’ women that are, like, shooting guns and, like, Angelina Jolie.”

And just to prove that I didn’t make this up, here’s the link to the video. I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried, believe me.

If you follow KKB on Twitter, you’ll notice her newest prospective BFF is Angelina Jolie.  Kwazy wants Angie baaad. After all, Angie HAS to be far more interesting than Kwazy’s old “BFF”, Gwyneth Paltrow. Gwynnie’s not a bad actress, but, in her “real life” appearances,  she’s like watching paint dry.

Course, Angelina Jolie is a pacifist/humanitarian who has probably never fired a real gun in her life and abhors violence, and wouldn’t want a gun toting whackjob like Kwazy any closer to her than the space it would take to fit a cop between them…but Kwazy never lets reality figure in her reasoning anyway.

I think Angelina Jolie should get her own television series, too. I mean, why earn umpteen millions of dollars per feature film using a prop gun and pretending to hit stuff, when she could make less money and work more hours in television?

Guns kill people, Kelly. I’m sure you think that’s “rockin'” too.

Don’t forget to visit LynnNChicago’s “I Hate Jill Zarin” blog, our favorite Reality Chopped, and Real City Housewife.

Oh, sorry, Kelly, I forgot about you and big words. A hu-ma-ni-tar-i-an is someone who is genuinely charitable, instead of just using photos from step and repeats to appear that way.

(And I’ll bet $5.00 that “humanitarian” appears in the very near future in Kwazy’s tweets. She does like to assimilate words.)

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5 Responses to A Brief Message From Our Sponsor…

  1. Earring Girl says:

    I visit all of the housewives twitter just to see what’s going on with them and where they will be appearing. I think Kelly is off her meds today-she is tweeting like crazy, posting a lot of YouTube videos, arguing with the other tweeters, blocking people and jumping from subject as to what she would like to do in her life (I dare guess that is what she is doing????) – here are some of her strange tweets:

    @nbolt1 I would love to write a book that could help people love what they have. Read the garden of eden. Its about true love
    18 minutes ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

    @chosking I was asked to help fight “bullying”. We are working on it. Anyone who wants to be rude to anyone should smile first, then talk.
    43 minutes ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

    @DavideSalegna I would love to create a clothing line,but first I want to help women shop their own closets and look hot!!!!!
    about 1 hour ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

    I uploaded a YouTube video — Kelly Killoren Bensimon channeling Angelina Jolie in Vegas http://youtu.be/BzhW5m0Bt0A?a
    about 1 hour ago via Google

    If I should do anything as my next step what should it be, I am meeting with the ultimate dreammakers. Give me ideas!!
    about 3 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

    http://twitpic.com/2drttk – I love kids who adore their daddy’s
    23 minutes ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

    The poster in this picture makes no sense to me she is half quoting Angelina’s remarks about Shiloh and adding her two cents and her name as if it is her original quote – Please explain it I don’t get it?????

  2. Amy E. says:

    Love your commentary! You are so spot on it’s hysterical. She’s just so crazy she doesn’t even know it. Enjoy your articles keep it up!

  3. Anisa says:

    Your blogs are on point! I look forward to reading each new post :)

  4. Pingback: I Hate Jill Zarin RHONJ Preview / Jill Zarin August 16, 2010 | Lynnnchicago101's Blog

  5. sophie says:

    These women amaze me. They’re so wrapped up in their egocentricity, they spend all day tweeting each inane thought that pops into their heads. I have millions of inane thoughts per day as well….but I’d really rather keep them to myself, as opposed to letting the world think I’m a narcissistic moron.

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